body positivity
Accepting your body as it is and attempting to make everyone else feel comfortable in their own skin as well. (x)
This is a definition you'll find on urban dictionary. Body positivity. In the last two years there has been a lot of important talking about said issue. It all started when a growing number of people started identifying themselves as feminists.
Those men and women pointed out very quickly that the reason why so many women around the globe hate their body is due to society's perception of beauty. Why, they asked, is it that in every single magazine or advertisement they only show models with a perfect body, trained and skinny? Why isn't there a variety of shapes displayed? No wonder so many women feel insecure about their own body, even hide it from other's view. And why are we telling others to wear clothing that "suits their body shape"?
With that the realization that everything's too much of a girl fight came along.
"We are at our best when we cheer each other on and build each other up.",
Taylor Swift once captioned her instagram post on the international women's day.
Therefore, we should also stop judging other girls for their appearance and we should help one another learning to accept your body.
I just tried to sound as neutral as possible but I have to admit, that I also whole-heartedly support these statements. Too often have I been insecure about my own or have seen friends critizising their bodies. And frankly, I was and am sick of it. Why? Because it diminishes the beauty of a person in their wholeness to a matter of appearance. We are not merely an object of desire, we're real people with real feelings and we deserve to be accepting of our body.
I am a
woman.
Therefore I
am an object.
A toy that
is supposed to be tossed around.
You can do
everything you want with me.
I won’t say
a single word.
That’s how
you like it right?
Quiet,
polite, timid.
You can put
your strings around my arms
Tie them
tightly around my waist and head
Move my
body in ways you want it to move.
Who ever
told you I was human?
Had
feelings?
Deserves to
be validated?
Why treat
me as a person
When you
can have fun with me disregarding the very fact?
Your heart
is fragile
But mine is
out of steel.
- society’s
perception
[something I wrote a week or so ago]
And it still bugs me to this day. It has come to my mind just recently how much I really hate it.
As you might know, I was in London with my best friend (and her boyfriend and her mom) only about two weeks ago. On our second day, we we - that is to say my best friend, her boyfriend and I - stood up very early and went to King's Cross to take a picture with the carriage that's stuck on the wall aka Platform nine and three-quarters, as we have seen the day before that otherwise we would have to wait hours in line. So we got there and took our pictures, each of us very excited that we stood at THAT place in King's Cross because we're huge fans of the series. Anyways, we just finished it off and stood aside to take a look at how the photos turned out while the next group of people started positioning themselves in front of the carriage.
Now, my best friend is someone who is very confident and loud about her opinion. A lot of people actually found her frightening in fifth grade and hence always accused her of doing anything or punching people or what not. That was not the truth though but merely the side she liked to show people off at first glance, probably more as a defence mechanism to only let the right people get to her. And that is how we became friends I guess because I refuse to judge people based on what I've heard about them. And I really like her for the person that she is, having both of those sides in her balanced so fragile yet so beautiful.
So we were looking at the pictures, keep in mind, my best friend is really confident about nearly every aspect of life, when she suddenly goes "I look fat in that picture, it's so ugly!". Her boyfriend and I shared a look. Obviously, we had quite a different opinion. We started arguing with her, reassuring that she looked nothing but beautiful in that photo but she wouldn't listen and she kept complaining about those pictures for about twenty minutes when she finally accepted defeat, seeing that it would get her nowhere.
It still made me sad, though. Here we've got this girl, beautiful inside and out, getting sad and bitter about her body shape. It also made me angry yet again that this kind of criticism is what is ingrained on many females when they are only little. You have to look good at all times or at least look better than the other girls. Why have we not questioned said behaviour earlier?
The most terrible thing about it is that it often destroys moments in which we were having fun or we're excited, just as it did with my best friend.
What I'm trying to say with all of this is that I kind of wish it was more talked about and not brushed aside by many people, mostly men, with "Oh, that's just how girls are! They are never content with their appearance!" (yes, I have heard that sentence many times in my life already and I'm only nearly 17 years old). Because how should one learn to love themselve if you can't even love your body, the powerhouse of yourself?
For now, I'm pointing back to the saying "Be the change you want to see" (as there is not much else I can do). And I hope you do, too. Because everyone deserves to find a life of their own.
xxx Sarah
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