As you might now, I was having some hard days scattered through the past few weeks. And as I mentioned in my last post on here, I kinda got into thinking about pain and wounds (also like I'm constantly trying to solve the mystery that is oneself and why I react to certain things the way I react).
And I was also thinking about how people like to judge other problems. If you ever told someone about your bad day you might've heard "Oh but others have it worse!" or "Chin up, there are worse things than that." and it just frustrates you since you feel like your problem is really important to you and it takes so much space up in your life but there they are, dismissing your sadness by comparing it to other people's. And I think whenever we do this, we do an injustice to others. As Charlie in The Perks of Being a Wallflower put it:
“I think that if I ever have kids, and they are upset, I won't tell them that people are starving in China or anything like that because it wouldn't change the fact that they were upset. And even if somebody else has it much worse, that doesn't really change the fact that you have what you have.”
judging other people's problems
Going a bit back to the example of my last post, imagine you are in your PE class and you're playing volleyball and a ball hits you in the face. Now others might shrug it off, saying it barely hurt them; maybe they are volleyball players themselves and got hit by the ball several times before so it's just fine for them. But then on the other hand, there are others (for example me) whose nose starts bleeding and they start crying because that part of their face is really sensitive to pain so obviously it is gonna hurt way more than for the other person. Would you tell the second person that their pain is negotiable or even that it is something that they made up? No. You would go up to them and help them get tissues and clean their face up and make sure the pain subsides eventually.
It shouldn't be much of a difference with mental health problems either. As many users on the internet already point out, mental illness is a disease of the brain and should be treated as such. Or maybe you don't even have a mental illness but are just sensitive to certain actions, like people talking behind your back or people leaving you as soon as they see a part of your true self, as it is with me. And yes, maybe you, the person who is listening to me, has never made negative experiences with it yourself and maybe your mind is structured differently so that if you were in my situation, you would not be sad for days on end but that's exactly the point. YOU ARE NOT ME.
And you'll never be. We all have a different mindset and approach to problems and I sometimes wish we would appreciate this difference more. And try to understand others more. Just TRY to feel what they are feeling. Being empathetic. Because I do believe, if we try to see things from other points of view, we could really help others find a life of their own, too.
xxx Sarah
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